This coming Saturday at around nine A.M., Arlene and I are moving out of our somewhat palatial digs here at the sprawling Hoye/Chan compound, and will be moving ourselves and our entourage to our isolated summer estate.
Some of you, I’m sure, have always wanted to be a part of my entourage, but have never been sure how to ask. No more! On that very morning, not only can you be a part of the growing legend, the epic saga that is me, you can also help me lift my crap into a rented van at no extra cost to yourself. In exchange for that, whoever you are, I will buy you pizza and allow you to use me as a reference should the famous and/or wealthy come calling to verify your credentials (“cred”, they call it) before allowing you into their inner circles. Indeed, possibly their inner sanctums.
You are welcome to consider this your first step into a larger world of fame, fortune and, one presumes, the corresponding debauchery, but I make no guarantees on that front. I, behold my stark contrast, consider this to be a straightforward pizza-for-labor exchange, so no photographs, please.