A few days ago, I stumbled across an open share at the company that makes the pay-per-call recordings from Mattel properties – you give them two bucks and they’ll call you with a prerecorded message from Dora The Explorer, or whoever, so your kid can hear Dora tell them to get better grades or do more housework or something.This particular open share included all the component .wav files of these prefabricated calls, which are totally weird and creepy to listen to, but the part that’s superweird is that there were also prerecorded names, to personalize the calls.

Almost seventeen thousand of them. Recited in perky barbie-voice to a one.

Once you’ve got information like that, there’s clearly only one thing to do. So I’ve sorted the names in that huge batch of files and, separated by 0.4 seconds of silence each, have compiled them all in alphabetical order into one 45Mb, four hour & forty-five minute file.

I have a theory that if you listen to the entire thing you will be driven stark, raving mad.

So, for education purposes only, handle with tongs, exercise caution, etcetera, I give you: Barbiephonic: Say My Name.

It’s an .ogg file, because LAME’s mp3 compression wasn’t giving me a faithful reproduction of the .wavs. Rehost it if you’re going to pass it around, please.


  1. Posted April 14, 2007 at 3:16 pm | Permalink

    This should make for some fun editing.

    Also, the ahref tag for the ogg link is a bit wonky.

  2. Mike Hoye
    Posted April 14, 2007 at 4:53 pm | Permalink

    Fixed, thanks.

  3. Nick
    Posted April 14, 2007 at 11:19 pm | Permalink

    There’s all kinds of potential prankage here! I’m reminded of the time I left a message on Rootham’s office voice mail from the Canadian Association of Ninja Lawyers. Oh, the fun we could have with this….

  4. Posted April 18, 2007 at 9:19 am | Permalink

    This cries out to be a torrent, Hoye, really. It’s the kind of thing that inevitably gets noticed by BoingBoing and the like…