Crosstown Traffic

April 10, 2004

If you’re travelling with Voyageur in the near future, you should phone them about their schedules. Make sure you talk to a human, and not their automated systems, because it turns out that everything on their website is an outright lie. You’d think that if you’re going to change your schedules, you’d also change the web page people read to find out about those schedules. And, call me crazy, you’d change those two things in precisely the same way.

“When does the next bus leave for Kingston?”

“Err… tomorrow morning. At ten. The last one left a few minutes ago.”

“Uh-huh. The schedule says that it leaves in fifteen minutes.”

“Well, we change our schedules four times a year, sir.”

“The schedule on your website right now says that it leaves in fifteen minutes.”

“Well, what do you want me to do about it?”

Dear Service Industry: when you ask me that question, I am filled with rage; I know instantly that I am dealing with a complete tool.


“The bus stops at Lincoln Fields, doesn’t it?”

“Uh, yeah.”

“Get on the phone and call the dispatcher. Tell the bus driver to wait there for me. I’ll take a cab.”

“Oh. Um, Ok.”

“I’ll wait here until you hear back from the dispatcher.”

“Ok, yeah.”

… time passes. Some other office drone emerges from the back office, to tell him that the dispatcher has left a message for him.

“Sir, they said they can wait ten or fifteen minutes, at most.”

“You didn’t tell the dispatcher where to call you back, did you?”

“I…”

I guess if you’re the kind of person who can solve simple problems you’re overqualified to work in the Voyageur office.


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